Time to let other real people talk about Gen X meeting midlife. These are voices of friends and friends of friends who were nice enough to respond to my questions earlier this year. (I love this part . . . kind of like a birthday party, unwrapping what people gifted me with . . . and I'm happy to share the gifts. You're all great. Thanks!)
I think most of us are in denial about middle age. I am....
I'm choosing to take the scenic route and not go through middle age.
Boomers still insist on thinking of themselves as middle aged. I, for one, am willing to let them keep the title.
Either I have never had a mid-life crisis, or I've had one every day since the age of 13.
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Question: Do you think GenX will approach midlife differently than other Generations? If so, how?
Answer: YES . . .
We had our children later so we will postpone midlife – we, I, am the mother of young children but I am only 6 years shy of when my mother became a grandmother and she was a late grandmother for her generation. Thus, we will stay “young” longer – soccer mom, PTA, etc.
People have been waiting longer to have children and so at an age like 43, definitely the “grandma” age at one time, my friends are having children. The “empty nest” syndrome may be taking longer to develop – that feeling that one big segment of life is completed with kids going off on their own and then what to do next that creates a need for self-reflection and restructuring of goals. Also, seems like people my age expect a much longer healthy and productive future for themselves than a generation or two ago.
We will, generally, not be as well off as our parents in retirement . . . no pensions, no social security.
Right now, as I work with seniors, many whom are in the dying process, I have concerns about Medicare, and Social Security, and programs that are currently available to my parents, but that may not be available when I need them. At bear minimum, they may be so spent from and taxed, that Generation X-ers may only get a small portion of what we have paid-in.
I think we may have it harder than others. We are balancing so much: family and the broad sense of caregiving for our parents and kids, work, social activities, and our worship, if we are the 1/3 of Americans who actively have time to worship. We are the "in debt" generation, not only financially but with our time as well.
I think my focus is on staying active and taking care of my health from a more wholisitic perspective rather than focusing on what pills or doctor's cures can mask the signs of aging is different from my parent's generation.
Well I do think I will approach this age differently than my parents, but not necessarily any different that the generation before me. I think we will enjoy ourselves more, and think more about our health. I think we have learned from watching our parents that we will probably live a long time, and it is important to make sure the quality of that time is optimized.
YES. I've noticed among my friends and counterparts a willingness to take a leap into the void and do things that our parents wouldn't have done. Turn 40 and decide on a total career change? Sure, why not! It's possible. You're 38 and you suddenly decide that Marketing sucks and you want to go to med school, even though it'll be 10 years before you're in practice? Sure! Do it! That has been the general attitude of my peers. We seem to have more of a willingness to take a chance and leave the confines of "but you have a good job with health insurance" behind. So many of my friends are currently in their "second act" - either willingly or as the result of a layoff - and every single one says the same thing: "It's the best thing I've ever done." For the generation before us, life changes seemed to only be allowed to occur in your 20s, and wherever you were when you hit 30, that's where you stayed forever. You lived in the same place, stayed in the same job... but not the Gen X'ers that I know. We seem to not mind moving around a lot, trying to find a place to live that makes us happy. My family before me never traveled, and I love being able to hop on a plane whenever I want to, and go to a different country. The whole world is more accessible, and I feel like Gen X'ers are all the richer for it. And 40 suddenly doesn't look like what 40 used to look like. I look at Jennifer Aniston on a talk show, who seems very 30-ish to me, and I realize that she's 42. And that's a great example of how I feel collectively about my generation: we're not aging the same way the previous generation aged. In fact, I fully expect that at some point in the 50-60 range I'll have to slow down, or maybe I'll have some kind of ailment that young people don't get, and I fully expect to be completely shocked by my sudden physical limitations, and my first thought will be "but how can I have THAT? I'm so young...." -- when, in fact, I'll be pushing 60.
Gen Xers probably place more emphasis on less important things than earlier generations. We're somewhat ego-centric. Past generations seem to revel in their family life as they age. We tend to focus on what we don't have anymore... looking in the mirror and seeing an unfamiliar face looking back. We're also very into our careers and maybe don't value ourselves for who we are but for what tangible things we can accomplish.
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Answer: MAYBE/ MAYBE NOT . . .
Not sure. We have a tendency to work in several different fields, so we might feel more well rounded in mid-life.
That is a 50/50 answer. I believe that life approach (politics, socio-environment etc.) determines ones path! This is true of any generation!
Don't really know. I guess we might update our Facebook status or something.
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Answer: NO . . .
I don't really think so. Regardless of generation, I see middle age as a time where you sort of get used to being in your own skin. Most of your important decisions are in the past, so you just play the remaining cards you've got.
No, it's midlife, move on.
So . . . yesterday, psychologists and researchers and my own ponderings . . . today, several Gen Xers stepping into the experience of midlife. Am I ready to draw conclusions or not? Hmm . . .
This blog post is part of a series of writing (April 3-May 14, 2011) by Tammy Fletcher Bergland about Generation X facing midlife. tbergland.blogspot.com
This blog post is part of a series of writing (April 3-May 14, 2011) by Tammy Fletcher Bergland about Generation X facing midlife. tbergland.blogspot.com
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